Hospital Jokes

Did you hear the one about...
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FireRebel
Posts: 28
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:33 pm

Hospital Jokes

Postby FireRebel » Sat Jan 26, 2008 10:19 pm

One that I found. Feel free to add.


In a hospital room, there was a man resting on the bed with an oxygen mask on.
When the nurse came in the room to open the blinds, the man asked her, "Are my testicles black?"
To which she replied, "I do not know... I am only here to open the blinds." The man asked her again, "Are my testicles black?" And he kept asking until he got on her nerves so much, that she finally unzipped his hospital gown, looked down there, checked under them, and said,
"They are fine." With a confused look on his face, he took of his mask, and shouted, "I SAID, ARE MY TEST RESULTS BACK????"
James Gallagher
New Brunswick


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3HlyGdVJMG4

Shilts
Posts: 88
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:33 pm

Postby Shilts » Tue Mar 04, 2008 6:53 pm

Wish I'd have heard that one when I was lin hospital last year !

Nagrom
Posts: 401
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:33 pm

Postby Nagrom » Tue Mar 04, 2008 10:09 pm

A mechanic is in the hospita one day, and sees a surgeon.
"You know there doc, we basically do the same thing,"
"How's that?" asks the surgeon.
"Well, I work on the hearts of cars. I take them apart, fix them and put them back together. When I'm done, the car hearts work just like new."
"I guess thats true," answers the surgeon.
"Say," asks the mechanic, "If we do the same thigns, how come I get paid nothing at all, and you make a lot of money. I wonder why that is?"
"Because," said the surgeon, "you take the engine apart and put it back together. I take the engine apart and put it back together without turning it off..."

RugbyCanada
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Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:33 pm

Postby RugbyCanada » Tue Mar 04, 2008 10:25 pm

A "new" Canadian {insert any accent} walks into a hospital screaming to see a Dr. because he has pains all over his body.

Dr.--"What seems to be the trouble?"
NewCan--"Everytime I touch my ear, OHHHHHH the pain!"
The Dr. looks at his ear. "And...?" he says.
NewCan--"Everytime I touch my chest, OOOOOOHHHHH the pain!"
The Dr. looks at his chest. "AND??"
NewCan--"Everytime I touch my knee, UOWOWOO the pain!!!"

The Dr. looks at him and says "You bruised your finger. Now GTFO {insert country of origin}"

:)
If you can read this, thank a teacher. If its in English, thank a vet.

jointclinic
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:33 pm

knee pain

Postby jointclinic » Tue Mar 01, 2016 6:42 am

For knee pain treatment it is essential to go to hospital that what is wrong going on and how we will avoid that?

EdwardThomas1957
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:33 pm

Postby EdwardThomas1957 » Thu Jul 07, 2016 1:27 pm

I love your jokes guys, please post more!


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