By request

Did you hear the one about...
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FFWannabe
Posts: 3898
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:33 pm

Postby FFWannabe » Sun Apr 03, 2005 10:43 am

When geese fly in formation, why is one side of the V longer than the other?
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There's more geese in it.... of course! ;)

hee heee heeeeee!!!

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Scuba
Posts: 3166
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:59 pm

Postby Scuba » Sun Apr 03, 2005 10:47 am

Oh god. Sue's got the lil'wannabe's joke book out again.......


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FFWannabe
Posts: 3898
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:33 pm

Postby FFWannabe » Sun Apr 03, 2005 10:51 am

hee hee... just trying to keep up with mutts!! haha!

Okay.. back to studying.... sure wish that was a joke! lol

Sue :)

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bestcoast
Posts: 2575
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:33 pm

Postby bestcoast » Fri Apr 29, 2005 5:39 pm

Sleeping Beauty, Tom Thumb and Quazimotto are sitting around shooting the breeze. Sleeping Beauty declares " I believe I am the most beautiful person in the world." Tom Thumb says" Well I believe that i am the smallest person in the world." And Quazimotto declares " Well then I say that I am the ugliest person in the world."
So they decide the only way to find out if they are what the say is to go down to the Guiness book of World records to see if they are correct.
Sleeping beauty goes in first and comes out with a piece of paper and declares " This piece of paper from Guiness confirms that i am the most beautiful person in the world and it can be found on page 44."
Tom Thumb goes in and comes out.." This piece of paper declares that i am the smallest person on earth and can be found on page 174."
Quazimotto goes in and after sometime comes out as says in a loud voice" WHO THE HELL IS CAMILLA PARKER BOWLES."
Last edited by bestcoast on Fri Apr 29, 2005 5:42 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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JoJobrat
Posts: 280
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:00 pm

Postby JoJobrat » Mon May 02, 2005 4:48 pm

what is warm and wet on the inside, hard and hairy on the outside, starts with a C and ends with a T?
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I will give you a hint! It has a U and an N in it!
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Coconut

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Scuba
Posts: 3166
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:59 pm

Postby Scuba » Mon May 02, 2005 4:51 pm

**** GROAN **** :rolleyes:


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wilderness
Posts: 2212
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:00 pm

Postby wilderness » Mon May 02, 2005 5:24 pm

Ok The Challendge Is On.......get Some Better Jokes Going Here Folks

[align=center:2jsip9q8]Lets Be damned Sure[/size:2jsip9q8][/align:2jsip9q8]
[align=center:2jsip9q8]That No Man's Ghost[/size:2jsip9q8][/align:2jsip9q8]
[align=center:2jsip9q8]Will Ever Say[/size:2jsip9q8][/align:2jsip9q8]
[align=center:2jsip9q8][color=red:2jsip9q8]"If Your Training Program[/color:2jsip9q8][/size:2jsip9q8][/align:2jsip9q8]
[align=center:2jsip9q8][color=red:2jsip9q8]Had Only Done It's Job"[/color:2jsip9q8][/size:2jsip9q8][/align:2jsip9q8]



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bestcoast
Posts: 2575
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:33 pm

Postby bestcoast » Mon May 02, 2005 5:38 pm

Jim and Edna were both patients at a mental hospital. One day when they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.
When the director of nursing became aware of edna's heroic act, she considered her to be mentally stable. When she went to tell edna the news she said " Edna I have good news and Bad news"
"The good news is you are being discharged, since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in the pool and saving the life of another patient. I have concluded your act displays a sound mind."
"The bad news is that Jim, the patient you saved, hanged himself in his bathroom with the belt from his robe right after you saved him.I am sorry, but he is dead."
Edna replied "He didn't hang himself, I put him there to dry. How soon can I go home."

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bestcoast
Posts: 2575
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:33 pm

Adult Content...

Postby bestcoast » Mon May 02, 2005 5:54 pm

A women emerges from her shower and stands in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts are to small. So for a change her husband comes up with a suggestion.
"If you want your breasts to grow then everyday take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between them for a few seconds."
Willing to try anything she grabs a piece of TP and stands in front of a mirror rubbing it between her breats.
"How long will this take she asks.?"
"They will grow larger over a period of years." her husband replies.
She stops. "Do you really think that rubbing a piece of TP between my breasts will make them larger over the years?"
Without missing a beat her husband replies " Worked for your butt didn't it!!"
By the grace of god he is still alive, and with a great deal of therapy and the generous help of hospital staff he may walk again someday............BC...
Last edited by bestcoast on Mon May 02, 2005 6:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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colin911
Posts: 631
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:33 pm

Postby colin911 » Mon May 02, 2005 6:03 pm

BC ... you've got some of the best jokes on here ... keep'em coming!
I'm running a fever and the only cure is more cowbell.


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